Friday, September 17, 2010

Strange levels of reality

  This morning I have tested my inner self in order to achieve a new understanding. To learn more about who I am. This is a recount of the events that have taken place. This is not illegal, and I do not advise the inxperienced shaman to try this without the proper experiences preperations and knowledge required to do this safetly. Salvia is powerful and should never be abused. It is a tool with a spirit that can crush your inner self if not properly manifested.
1 Large Quid of salvia approx 7 grams salvia leaves chewed for exactly 32minutes (why 32 i will never know its just my thing with Quids)
Approx 8 oz of a tea made with 3 grams powdered salvia and approx 1/4gram of homemade prickly lettuce extract I had made the day before (the lettuce opium as it is referred to gives me a tolerance to the side effects of salvia, lettuce opium also believed to increase the visionary effects of shamanistic journeys, I also use this substance as I am unable to feel the effects of opiates and opiate related properties)
1 Glass pipe preloaded with .2 grams 20x potency salvia extract

Over the period of 32 minutes while chewing the Quid I take small sips of the tea and hold it in my mouth for about 20 seconds each time, I also slowly chew piece by piece of the quid as this tends to be more effective for my quests. when 32 minutes was up i felt the effects beginning to take hold but I distract myself to delay my journey until I am fully ready to begin.

   I looked into the mirror and everything seemed to be the same, I told myself repeatedly that I was in control to delay my journey long enough to take a look around,  I hear our cats playing in the room beside me, smiled to myself knowing how they were happy and carefree as usual, the mirror is a little dirty and the bathroom is a little bit messy. So it was just a normal morning like any other. Just making sure that if anything happens I would be relatively safe. I put both hands on the mirror taking a look deep within my own eyes. Seeing myself staring back intently with those eyes that arent exactly green or blue or even anything in between but both in the same so hard to describe. Focused and determined, I repeat to myself "This is a test of inner strength" over and over for a couple minutes, then i take my hands off the mirror when I am satisfied that I have achieved the perfect state for my test. I Grab my glass pipe and my trusty bic, I never use torch lighters for salvia somehow the effects seem more violent with jet flame as I call it, I Inhale the entire contents of my pipe deeply and begin to hold my breath. I count to five and put my hands back on the mirror, I count to ten and repeat in my mind this is a test of inner strength, I count to 15 and close my eyes, then I count to 27 and release the contents of my lungs never breaking concentration as to what is about to occur. 32 seconds after I have inhaled the contents of my pipe I feel myself pulled into the mirror but at the same time I feel as though I have been pulled into myself and I know that my journey Has truly begun. I know who I am and that I am in my bathroom so I open my eyes but the bathroom I saw was not the same as the one I had just looked around at everything was reversed colours were slightly off and the light didnt seem like light anymore, there is no longer the sound of cats playing in the other room so I begin to worry and leave the bathroom. Suddenly I am no longer in control of what is taking place and what should have been a reversed bedroom was now an island. noone was around no plants, no animals, no sounds except for the wind blowing against my face as I stare out into an ocean that I had never seen before. After wondering where I was for a few "minutes" I begin to see flashes of myself throughout my life growing up. Some things I remembered and smiled. then there were some things that were unfamiliar I thought maybe they were forgotten memories but then I realized what I was seeing was entirely different, these strange foreign memories they were mine but not the same me that was standing with his hands against the mirror/. I believed it to be the memories of my mirrored self. Fascinated I look around some more and notice that i am being watched by the mirrored me. "He" he motions for me to approach "him" and he takes my hands and places them on top of his. I felt a strange sense of understanding at that moment and realizing this was what i was searching for. As soon as I realized this my shadow self became one with me and shared "his" lifetime of experience with me. A couple tears begin to streak down my face out of pain I had experienced of my other self and out of joy of the unity within. I tell myself that I am ready to go back and that I had learned all I had needed. I "wake" out of my shamanistic journey and feel amazingly refreshed and ready to take the world on. not by myself but with the self unity I had now earned.

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